Keep on Rainin’

Last week one Adam Jones met with commissioner Roger Goodell about his possible re-instatement back into the NFL.   Jones left optimistic he will finally be able to join his teammates as the newest member of the Dallas Cowboys.

This makes you wonder just what oh what Pacman and Roger would discuss? Seriously, what would that conversation sound like?  Funny things.  Pacman has not played a down in the NFL in past 16+ months and was acquired in a trade by the Dallas Cowboys.  Pacman is suspended for multiple run-ins with the law, most notably his issues with shootings at strip clubs in multiple cities around the county.

In quite a stroke of irony, Pacman will now call home in one of the most notorious strip club cities in the United States.  With over 50 strip clubs in the Dallas/Fort Worth area including Exotic Magazine‘s two time nude club of the year “Clubhouse“. 

Once Pacman is officially reinstated by Commissioner Goodell he will report to the Cowboys training facility in Valley Ranch, Texas on a daily basis.  After some research a list of the best 8 – 10 strip clubs within driving distance will be mailed to him, including turn by turn mapquest directions from the practice facility, helping Pacman easily find those strip clubs he loves oh so much…quickly.

Early indications have shown the possibly that perhaps this is a new Pacman.  After a recent party at ex-Cowboy Deion Sanders house, new teammate Terrell Owens said. “We went inside and were playing around on the basketball court, and I asked him if he was ready to play. He said, ‘Yeah, but we’re not going to no strip clubs this year either.’

So they’re already on his mind.  And hopefully this helpful message from seemingly nowhere will be in Pacman’s fan mail one day after practice, and we’ll believe Pacman’s proclamation when we see i

What the Blood Clot?

As your Philadelphia Flyers prepare for game 1 of their Eastern Conference quarterfinal match-up against the Penguins, last night defensemen Kimmo Timonen, the man who was going to be primarily responsible for keeping Sidney Crosby, was lost for the series.

In game 4 against the Canadiens, Timonen blocked a shot that deflect off his left ankle and after playing in severe pain in the game 5 clincher, Timonen had a MRI earlier in the week that did not reveal the clot. But after going to the hospital yesterday, a surgeon discovered the clot. BING BANG BOOM, out for the series.

DOESN’T IT FRICKIN’ FIGURE PHILADELPHIA?

Yes I am being Neg – adelphia right now. But why should we expect anything else? Every time we get close to the promised land, something out of the blue arises. Joe Carter, Marshall Faulk, Ronde Barber, Ricky Manning Jr, Bill Beli – cheat, going against a team on a 20 game win streak in the playoffs (Colorado Rockies), Shaq and Kobe. There always seems to be something and now this.

Our best defensemen is now out for the series and the Flyers must adjust on the fly. But still feel confident Flyers fans, Derian Hatcher’s new line mate will most likely Braydon Coburn, the two of them were paired earlier in the season and were very successful together. And now look for Coburn and Hatcher to share the responsibility of shutting down Ev-gay-ni Malkin, and Sydney Cunt-sby, and look for fine results. And if Marty Biron continues on the pace he has set all post-season, although YES this loss is a huge blow, it might not quite be fatal.

Prediction: Flyers in 7 gut-wrenching games.

Samuel, Nooo

Before game 5 in Detroit last night, hometown native Bill Green wanted to stroll through the old block and show his neighborhood off to fellow teammate Samuel Slammin’ Dalembert. Somewhere along their day together, Bill offered Sammy a free fade at his favorite hometown barber shop. When asked about getting his fade “tightened up”, Samuel flat came out with it and declared, “Forget the fade! I want to get something crazy”.

Crazy doesn’t describe what Slammin’ walked out of the shop with on his dome piece. As the Sixers headed to the Palace at Auburn Hills for Game 5 last night of their Eastern Conference Quarterfinal match up with the Pistons, Sammie felt he had eased himself of the playoff pressures with this new Doo.

Wonder what it means? Well let’s dive into the scribe on the sides. On the left side spelled out is “LT”.

Have a guess what it means?

Please enlighten me, because I have no idea and neither does anyone else, including Sammie I bet. When asked what it meant Samuel declined to comment.

Althoughhhh, when asked if wanted to elaborate on the right half, where you will notice the letters “SD” carved out, one SD claimed the “SD” on the side of his head was simply not his initials, but in fact it stands for what his game is all about!

“Strong defense,” he said.

Really Samuel?

Dalembert’s primary focus, Rasheed Wallace, scored 19 points on 8-for-12 shooting, 11 in a first half in which the Pistons ran off to a 14-point lead.

Okay, so maybe it was all a ploy to throw off the Pistons, make them dumbfounded and wondering all night what the fuck would possess someone to go out in public looking like this? Didn’t work. ‘Sheed Wallace blocked four shots in the first quarter alone, all while fixated and rather amused. Dalembert reported post-game rather intellectually and deep; “He was talking to me all game,” saying, ‘What the hell?’ And those sort of things.”

Wallace said speaking after the game “I told Mo that should have been a team fine…Coming into a game looking like that.” At the very least Rasheed, at the very least.

And with all the tension gone, and Samuel at ease post-haircut, Dalembert ended up having a rather relaxing evening, scoring 4 points, pulling down 6 rebounds in 29 solid minutes. I guess now we all understand why he demands the ball more right? Even with the outstanding numbers you expect from a $9.8 million dollar center, the doo is staying according to Samuel, who has no plans to BIC his head, so look for “LT” and “Strong Defense” to be on the Wachovia Center floor Thursday as the Sixers make an early exit from the ’08 playoffs.

Wrap it Up

Well 215 fans, who woulda thunk it?

Tonight, yyyyyour Philadelphia 76ers take on the Hawks in Atlanta, and with a victory tonight the 76ers will clinch a playoff berth.

With the Sixers magic number at 1 over both the Indiana Pacers and New Jersey Nets, a win tonight and the Sixers are in for the first time since 2005, quicker then any of us imaged post-Iverson.

It won’t be easy as the Sixers are on the road against one of the hottest teams in the NBA, a Hawks team that has won 9 out of their last 11 and are in a battle for the 8 seed in the East, also with Indiana and New Jersey. The man the Sixers will need to look to keep in check tonight is ‘The Game’ look-a-like, Hawk forward Josh Smith, who has been averaging 20 points, 6 boards, 6 assists, and 6 blocks a game during that stretch.

If the Sixers do fall short tonight, they can still clinch today with a loss by BOTH the Pacers, in Milwaukee and the Nets, in Detroit. If the Sixers come up short tonight and either the Nets or Pacers win, the Sixers next opportunity to clinch will come tomorrow night, this time at the Wachovia Center against the same aforementioned Hawks.

Where’s the Imodium?

Well 215 fans, another Opening Day is upon us and on my morning drive into the office today, as on most mornings, I flip between 610 am and 950 am’s morning shows.

In doing so, I have become more and more sure DIA-Rhea Hughes is just about as enjoyable to listen too as the runny, watery, delightfully smelling diarrhea as her name suggests. 

I am almost positive that I despise Dia-Rhea more then that COCK-A-ROACH on WIP between the hours of 3 and 7 pm.

This morning was just another case in point. In a rather humorous conversation between Cataldi, Greg “the Bull” Luzinski, and former Phillies pitcher “Wild Thing” Mitch Williams, in which the Bull stated “the only way I’d ever hit a inside the park HR is if all three outfielders collided and burst into flames.” The subject then turned to how unfortunate it was that Luzinski’s career was chopped down a few years early due to knee replacement surgery.

Next, Dia-Rhea decides this is the perfect forum to go into a tangent about how she will not trust doctors.

You see, Dia-Rhea detailed they(doctors) don’t really know anything because someone in her family was really ill for a year and they couldn’t diagnosis it. Then one day her mother goes into a library does her own research and tells the doctors hey is it possibly this? TAAAA DDDAAAA; said family member is cured. So not only is Dia-Rhea Hughes’ mother Doctor House in solving this one in a million case in which the licensed, trained professional doctors couldn’t figure out the infection, it also causes Hughes to never take a doctor’s word …  in her words for the last 15 years.

Dear Dia-Rhea,

A woman with the true face for radio, and an equally delightful voice, it is time for you to move along Dia-Rhea and please rid the airwaves of your “lovely” presence.  Your voice sends chills down my spine and you have no relevance to SPORTS RADIO what – so – ever.  You were most likely hired because you are truly a bitch and would have cried “foul” for not getting the position. Go jump off the Walt Whitman please.

Thank you, that will be all for now.

Chris

AI’s Return: Top 10 Countdown: #1

No. 1 STUNNA — “HE STEPS OVER LUE!”

You knew it when you saw number two.  June 6, 2001 Staples Center, the city of stars Los Angeles, California.  Game 1 of the NBA Finals.

The raucous STAPLES Center crowd began chanting “SWEEP, SWEEP,” even before Game 1 began, and the Lakers looked the part by scoring 16 straight points early on jumping out to an 18-5 lead. However, clearly relishing his first appearance in the NBA Finals, Iverson was incredible for the first 2 1/2 quarters, scoring 38 points as the 76ers took a 73-58 lead.

Then the Lakers inserted rarely-used Tyronn Lue who was a surprise player on the Laker playoff roster. Lue even imitated Iverson in practice for a week leading up to Game 1 in order for LA to practice defending the Answer. Guarded by the speedy Lue most of the rest of the way, Iverson scored only three points until his flurry in overtime. Iverson broke free and hit a pull up transition 3 pointer and then with 48.2 seconds remaining, a highlight for NBA Finals history was made.

Starring Lue down baseline in front of a standing Lakers bench Iverson broke down Lue off the dribble, pulled back, hit a 20 footer, and EMBARASSINGLY walked right over top a fallen Lue.  A moment that no Philadelphia sports fan will ever forget. The bucket sealed a thrilling Game 1 overtime victory over the previously un-beatable LA Lakers. The most unforgettable moment from the unforgettable 2001 Finals  season.

The number 1 moment in Allen Iverson’s Philadelphia 76ers career…..

AI’s Return – Top 10 Countdown: #2

No. 2 — “MVP, MVP, MVP”

Our number 2 moment in the Answer’s top 10 moments in a 76er uniform comes once again from the memorable 2000-2001 season’s run to the NBA Finals. Game 5 of the Eastern Conference Semi’s, series tied 2-2. In the pre-game ceremony Allen Iverson was given his Most Valuable Player award for his 42 minutes a night (league leader), 31.1 points per game (league leader), 2.5 steals per game (league leader), and 4.6 assists per game season, while leading the 76ers to the number 1 seed in the Eastern Conference.

After accepting the MVP trophy, the Answer delivered on cue.  The NBA’s Most Valuable Player scored 52 points, including 29 in the first half, and poured in eight 3-pointers, a team playoff-record. The 76ers beat the Toronto Raptors 121-88 to take a 3-2 lead in the Eastern Conference semifinal series. The Answer was the second player to score 50 or more points twice in a series; Michael Jordan is the only other player to do so, against Cleveland in 1988.

The number 2 moment, Allen Iverson, the 2001 NBA Most Valuable Player.

AI’s Return – Top 10 Countdown: #3

No. 3 – A Career High

February 12, 2005, it was the Answer’s day. Allen Iverson dropped his career high 60 points against the Orlando Magic. It was in the middle of the Sixers last season going to the playoffs under Iverson, and the Sixers won 112-99 behind Iverson’s 60 points on 17-36 shooting and 24-27 from the free throw line.  The win brought the Sixers record to a mere 24-25 on the season.

The number 3 moment in our top 10 moments of Allen Iverson’s in a Sixer uniform, scoring a career high 60 points.

AI’s Return – Top 10 Countdown: #4

No. 4 – Breakin’ Ankles and Becoming a Superstar

In the final weeks of the Answer’s rookie season, the Sixers were just playing through the schedule as another lottery bound off-season was approaching.

Michael Jordan and the defending (soon to be re-peat) champion Bulls came to the “CoreStates Center” in the first week of April.   Allen Iverson gave us one more to add to his Rookie of the Year highlight reel as he was isolated at the top of the key with the game’s greatest, Michael Jordan. The fans stood and called for his patented crossover, and in true A.I. fashion he delivered, breakin Jordan’s ankles and bringing the “CoreStates Center” down one final time in his inaugural season.

Number 4 in our Allen Iverson top 10 moments in a 76ers uniform, AI versus MJ.

AI’s Return – Top 10 Countdown: #5

No. 5 – “PLAYOFFS??”

The number 5 moment in our countdown to honor the return of Allen Iverson back to the (215) Wednesday night comes from the 1999 lockout shortened season. It was the beginning of something special forming under the Allen Iverson-Larry Brown era, as Iverson led the league in scoring and the Sixers to the playoffs for the first time post-Barkley.

The Sixers won game 1 then lost a tough one in game 2 when the offense just didn’t show up as the Sixers scored 68 points while shooting 38% from the field. That set the stage for game 3, the first Sixer home playoff game since the 1991 East semi-finals and the Answer as always, delivered. He came out and dropped 33 points and had a playoff record 10 steals in the victory, setting the stage for game 4 and a possibly clinch the series.  Game 4 proved to be just that as the Sixers came out and wrapped up the series in 4 games and advanced behind Iverson’s 37 point and 9 assists.

Number 5 moment; May 15, 1999. The first of many Sixers post-season series clinchers in the Iverson era. Game 4, 1999 Eastern Conference 1st Round.